In the 1990s, Alicia Silverstone, an actress, became well-known for her role as Cher Horowitz in the teen drama Clueless. The focus these days is on Alicia’s parenting, even if she is still acting and generally active in Hollywood. Bear Blu Jarecki, 11, is raised by 46-year-old Alicia, whose upbringing was anything but typical.
Bear’s Parents
Unlike his musical father Christopher Jarecki, Bear’s mother is a well-known figure. Before getting married, Christopher and Alicia dated for eight years after meeting outside a movie theater.
Bear was born in 2011 and the pair has continued to be active parents in Bear’s life despite their marital problems. Alicia and Christopher unfortunately divorced in 2018 after 20 years of marriage. Bear is shared between the ex-couples, and they intend to co-parent peacefully.
The Controversy
When Alicia posted a video of herself feeding a 10-month-old Bear to her website, The Kind Life, in 2012, criticism of her parenting surfaced. In the video, Alicia fed Bear food that had already been chewed.
The decision was contentious, to say the least, and the general public began to doubt all of Alicia’s parenting strategies. However, the actress doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with it, stating that “This has been going on for thousands of years — it’s still going on all over the place — and it’s natural.”
Alicia’s Parenting Style
One of the many well-known parenting philosophies is attachment parenting, which is what Alicia practices. The emotional and physical connection between a parent and child is the main focus of attachment parenting.
For instance, believing that sobbing is a form of communication rather than a tantrum or manipulation, and sharing a bed. The foundation of attachment parenting is the idea that a parent’s relationship with their kid will influence all of the child’s subsequent relationships. However, Alicia offers a distinct description of her parenting approach.
A Natural Mom
A“natural” mom is what Alicia calls herself. “I just do what’s natural. I’m a loving mama. I believe in love, I believe in nature and our society is scared of nature and scared of love.”
When questioned why she was so close to Bear, Alicia responded that’s how parenting works in the wild. “If you were in any kind of wild setting where there are animals, if you put your baby over there, your baby is going to get eaten. So, it’s not ideal for the baby to be over there.”
Alicia’s Household
Solar panels and an organic vegetable garden may be found in Alicia’s environmentally friendly home. The family refuses to buy any single-use disposables and composts their own waste in addition to bringing their own bags to the store. Both Alicia and Bear have a history of adopting rescue animals into their homes, and they are both vegans.
“I try to lead by example. Bear sees me making choices all day long that benefit our planet […] He is a little eco-ambassador for our planet; compassionate, loving, curious, and aware.”
Medical Choices
Alicia prefers to let Bear’s body self-regulate because she isn’t a huge supporter of modern medicine. The actress asserts that her son has never required any form of medical treatment, including vaccinations and antibiotics.
“I’m not saying I wouldn’t give it to him… I’m saying he doesn’t need it. This is a kid who’s been [sick] twice in his life. Twice. For, like, a few hours. He said, ‘Mommy I don’t feel good. I’m going to lie down.’ In his whole life, twice.”
Gender Fluid
Bear’s parents don’t want him to follow gender expectations, especially in today’s society. He’s been made fun of in the past for his long hair, but he decided to maintain it, and Alicia agreed with him.
“Mama and Papa aren’t going to stop him from being him. He’s beautiful and we love his hair! We would never impose any social ideas about what hair on a boy or girl should look like. We should all try to embrace our children and who they choose to be without any judgment!”
Letting Go of Bear’s Locks
Bear cut his hair at the age of nine after deciding that he was ready for a change. Bear buzzed his entire mane, which at that time reached his waist. It was a major transition for her, according to Alicia, and her son now resembles a “kid” rather than a “baby.”
The actress likes Bear’s new appearance, though she needs some time to get used to it. She does believe he will eventually grow his hair out again, though. She is protecting his unattached locks in the interim.
Bath Time
Although bath time is a favorite activity in the Silverstone household, some people find it repulsive how much Bear and Alicia enjoy it. The mother and son take a bath together, or at least they did until Bear was nine; it is uncertain if they still do so today.
While many fans thought the action was wrong, others argued that it is typical in many other cultures. Some viewers simply couldn’t see how logistically the Silverstones’ bath time works because bathing a young child doesn’t seem like it would be soothing.
Bedtime
Similar to bath time, Bear and Alicia prepare for bed together. The actress and her 11-year-old son are still sleeping in the same bed as of July 2022. Alicia stated, “Bear and I still sleep together. And I’ll be in trouble for saying that but I don’t really care.”
Many fans criticized the technique as being blatantly unethical and verging on predatory, thus her conclusions were accurate. Others offered their own remedies, such as sleeping with their current kids or sharing a bed with their parents, to demonstrate that they don’t find it unusual.
Potty Training
When Bear was still a newborn, Alicia had some unusual ideas about potty training. Elimination communication, a method that does away with diapers, is a favorite of Silverstone’s.
Instead, the parent watches their child for signs that the infant needs to use the restroom before holding the youngster over the toilet. Because of how effectively this approach works, according to Alicia, Bear was fully toilet trained by the time he was six months old!
No Stroller? No Problem!
Like many adherents of attachment parenting, Alicia didn’t put Bear in a stroller when he was a young child because she felt that his growth depended on him being physically close to her.
Instead, Alicia either wore Bear in a sling or carried him in her arms. Given her dislike of diapers, strollers, and cribs (which she describes to as “neglect”), it’s not surprising that Alicia has stated that her parenting philosophy is all about “getting back to basics and doing away with excess.”
No Need for Discipline
Alicia rejects the idea of punishment. She asserts that she doesn’t need to use medication because Bear’s moods are well-controlled as a result of his vegan, all-natural diet. There is a peacefulness about him, a sense of balance that is not extreme.
“I don’t have to yell or scream or, like, discipline. None of that is necessary. All I have to do is say, ‘Oh, Bear, no thank you,’ and he goes, ‘Okay, mom.’ He’s got it. We just can talk like that because he’s not feeling crazy.”
A Tech-Free Home
Ironically, Alicia works as an actor whereas Bear seldom ever goes to the movies. This is due to the Silverstones’ mostly tech-free home. Even though they occasionally treat themselves to a movie, Alicia and Bear would much rather spend time together than alone in front of a screen.
The outdoors, exercising, and playing with their pets are things that Bear and Alicia enjoy doing. Although she and Bear don’t use gadgets, Alicia proudly claims, “Bear and I have never experienced boredom.”
Bear’s Seal of Approval
Alicia is presently looking for a relationship, but anyone who wants to date the actress must first have Bear’s approval. Alicia tells her son about every date she goes on, and she won’t pursue someone really if Bear isn’t thrilled with them.
However, she acknowledges that some elements of finding love again are “confusing.” As of 2021, Alicia has declared that she’s on numerous dating apps that she’s “super excited about being available and open to whatever’s next.”
Co-Parenting
Alicia and Christopher, Bear’s father, nevertheless get along well and enjoy co-parenting despite the fact that they are no longer romantically involved. “Bear, his dad, and I flow really well together,” the actress has observed.
Alicia attributes some of this to the fact that she and Christopher still speak frequently and are close friends. She thinks Bear also gains from the fact that his parents are diametrically opposed. He receives the full picture because his father leads a quite different life.
A Free Thinker
Alicia has demonstrated her willingness to challenge the status quo, and she desires to instill in Bear a sense of independence. When speaking to her son, the actress frequently advises him to “question everything” and “don’t believe what they tell you.”
Silverstone does what she teaches by making sure Bear see her “not necessarily doing what the masses are doing and really questioning things, really thinking about things, and looking at things through a magnifying glass.”
Activism Runs in the Family
As Bear gets older, it appears that he is increasingly following in his mother Alicia’s footsteps, who is a vegan campaigner. The Silverstone family attributes Bear’s great physical condition, decent conduct, and Alicia’s fertility to their vegan lifestyle.
Alicia has been vegan since 1998, and Bear has been vegan his entire life. Alicia has said of her son’s health: “He’s such an example of health. This is a child who is plant-based.”
Cribs = Neglect
As was previously indicated, Alicia views placing a child in a crib as neglect. She also thinks children should have the option of spending as much time as they want in their parents’ bed. So it shouldn’t surprise anyone that Alicia has some rather unkind things to say about cribs.
She claims that parents who confine their kids to “a barred-in box completely alone” miss out on a chance to build relationships. The ability to better understand Baby’s needs when you share a bed with her fosters security and trust.
Independence
The opposite of what one might expect from an attachment parenting approach, according to Alicia, Bear is actually more autonomous than many of his friends. “The whole idea is that you love and attach so much so that they’re free enough to be and leave.”
She continued, “It’s heartbreaking, but you have to. My kid’s so fiercely independent because he is right [in my heart] all the time. He’s so great.”
Alicia’s Parenting Book
The Kind Mama: A Simple Guide to Supercharged Fertility, a Radiant Pregnancy, a Sweeter Birth, and a Healthier, More Beautiful Beginning was the title of Alicia’s parenting book that was published in 2014.
The Kind Mama has received a great deal of criticism and has been thoroughly examined by childcare professionals, despite Silverstone’s claim that she wrote it as “a guide for women so they could have that experience that they deserved to have.”
The Backlash
The majority of Alicia’s book is anecdotal and unscientific, say many of her detractors. They contend that a lot of The Kind Mama’s recommendations are harmful to a child’s physical and psychological health.
Alicia clarifies that she never claimed to be an authority and that the parenting strategies in her book are just those that have worked for her. “Everything that’s in the book is there to show you why you might want to consider it, always just to give you information. […] If you don’t choose that, that’s totally fine.”
Proud of Her Choices
Alicia is pleased of her parenting decisions and the book she wrote despite the criticism. She claims that on the street, ladies frequently come up to her to express gratitude for the parenting guidance that has transformed their life.
The actress feels that becoming a mother and taking up activism have given her a purpose and that she is changing the world for the better. Silverstone responds to the critics by saying, “Anyone who has issues with it can have them; it doesn’t affect me.”
Kisses on the Lips
Whether or whether parents should kiss their children on the lips tends to be a very divisive topic. Given how important physical intimacy is to Alicia, it’s hardly surprising that she has no trouble kissing Bear on the lips to express her love.
The actress even made light of the fact that Bear was perplexed after seeing Clueless for the first time and believed he was required to kiss his mother in the manner depicted in the film.
The Rules of Social Media
Being a celebrity parent, Alicia obviously has no influence over Bear’s paparazzi images or the websites where they are published. Nevertheless, she makes an effort to preserve her son’s privacy on her own social media account.
If Bear doesn’t consent to it first, Alicia won’t post anything about him online. The 11-year-old seemed content so far to share his life with his mother’s followers.
Mom to the Rescue
Many parents of young children adhere to the self-soothing or “cry it out” strategy. Instead of rushing to comfort the infant, this entails letting them cry until they’re done or finding solace on their own. The goal is to instill independence in the child.
However, Alicia is opposed to this approach and preferred to be at Bear’s side whenever he was angry. The faith that babies have in their parents to care for them, according to Silverstone, is disrupted by anything other than being present when a child is crying.
Alicia Knows to Be Selfish
Although motherhood is a selfless profession, Alicia firmly thinks that in order to be a better mother to Bear, she needs some time to concentrate on her needs.
The actress makes sure she has some alone time each day, eats healthily, and gets enough sleep. Alicia thinks that by teaching Bear to prioritize his own self-care, it not only enables her to be a more emotionally stable role model for him.
But Doesn’t Want to Miss Anything
Alicia understands the need of taking time for herself, but she also doesn’t want to miss anything during Bear’s early years. When Silverstone and her kid are together, she makes an effort to be as present intellectually and emotionally as she can.
Alicia explains, “It’s not some kind of spoiled thing. It’s just that when you love someone, you want to take them in and soak them in. And many of us didn’t get that.”
Will Bear Get Siblings?
It appears like Alicia won’t be adding to her family anytime soon. That, though, is not for lack of desire. The 46-year-old continued, “I wanted to have more [kids], but then my relationship got messed up, and it wasn’t a great time to bring one in.”
“I didn’t want to have one right away because I was so in love with my Bear […] so it wasn’t until he was like three that I was ready to make another baby and then I didn’t have a partner.”
Alicia’s View on Motherhood
Alicia is aware that the way she raises her children has generated debate, but she doesn’t appear to care. “The things I’m doing I’m not inventing, I didn’t invent any of it. I would love to take credit for all of it but it’s not me unfortunately, it’s just me following nature.”
With the assurance that her family is content and in good health, Silverstone feels at peace. She also enjoys being a mother! She had remarked that “being a mom is the most precious, most unbelievable experience in this world.”